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Join my new religion. By Matthew Norman

Regulars | By Matthew Norman

My son’s friend never follows the news so is elected chief prophet

If the details are paltry at this embryonic stage, the same could once have been said for Jesus, and the Buddha. The gist is this. I have decided to start a religion. If you want to get very rich very quick, but lack the criminal talent to cash in on the absence of a functioning police force, founding a religion is the obvious way. L Ron Hubbard’s creation of Scientology enabled him to keep both himself and his dear old mum, L Mother Hubbard, in resplendent style. As L himself put it, ‘If a man really wanted to make a million dollars, the best way to do it would be start his own religion.’ That was a long time ago, of course. If we factor in compounded inflation, a billion quid seems a more sensible ambition today. How to achieve this modest target remained a nebulous pipe dream until a...

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